Don't Worry - When You Arrive At The Bridge You'll Know How To Cross

By Josephine Lim-Weston

John 14:27
My peace I give to you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.

A few days ago I realised that I've been afraid of my own darling baby. I thought I have been calm thus far since I got pregnant with Jean-Luc til giving birth to him and everyday since. The thought of feeding during the night and that I'll be deprived of my sleep actually troubled me but I've been shelving this fear and denying it as I must've got no time to process that thought. In fact by the grace of God I've been handling Jean-Luc quite well especially during the night with the fact that he's sleeping in the same room with us and that his father needs to wake up early to go to work on weekdays so I make sure Jean-Luc doesnt cry or cry as little as possible whenever he wants feed or nappy changed.

So instead of allowing fear of feeding through the night taking further root in me and rob me of my peace, love and appreciation for my darling son I chose to confront that fear. Being fearful and troubled will rob me from enjoying my son and being grateful to God for this gracious gift He gave to me and Andrew. God doesn't want us to be worried or troubled or being burdened by a blessing He gives us. Everything we encounter in life is to make us stronger and draw us closer to God so we will find His strength, wisdom, comfort and joy to overcome.

I remember the wise saying of my late maternal grandmother. She said, "Dont worry too much - when you arrive at the bridge you'll know how to cross." Hence I've tried to approach life that way. From the time I realised I was pregnant to wondering whether this would be a successful pregnancy to knowing that my baby was breech and needing to have a painful ECV to turn him around to going through caesarean; to have my baby delivered to having; to depend only on paracetamol as the only pain relief from caesarean as I developed allergy toward ibuprofen; and to future upbringing of Jean-Luc, I have depended on God and will be trusting Him much more in order to live life unafraid and untroubled.

So now instead of worrying, I choose to surrender (all my cares to God). Instead of being troubled, I choose to pray and entrust it all into the hands of God and leave it as that then watch for His deliverance. No point making a fuss about it or making others afraid or worry alongside with me. The first person I will approach regarding anything that troubles or worries me is God. No point arguing or blaming anyone for it. Just go to God straight and this will save us lots of trouble and further regrets. Don't depend on our own strength to overcome or seek human limited wisdom but seek First the Kingdom of God and His righteousness and all these things shall be added unto us (all that we need and desire will be answered and much more) - Matthew 6:33.

As of now since I've acknowledged the hidden fear and choose to trust God I'm enjoying my darling son more and able to love, admire and bond with him free from fear.